It Won't Be Easy, But It'll Be Worth It
Where do I begin?
In July of 2008 I was the mother of a 3-month old, a 2-year old, and a 3-year old, and I'd learned approximately a month earlier that we were going on an expat assignment to St. John's, Newfoundland, Canada. The news didn't come as a surprise. My husband and I had been to Moscow, Russia several years earlier, but I returned to the U.S. to give birth to our first child, and we always knew the opportunity to move abroad would likely present itself again. The move to St. John's was not an easy relocation. And not just because my children were young and the weather was unreasonable. (If you've ever lived in or even visited St. John's you know as well as I do that "unreasonable" is exactly how the weather should be described.) But because every relocation is difficult, and international moves add a extra level of difficulty. International moves--even those "just" to Canada--are best undertaken by intermediate players. Beginners beware. I coped with that relocation in 2008 by starting a blog called How Do You Pronounce That? I was home with three little ones, and that blog helped me feel a connection to my family and friends back home. And it became cathartic. It helped me through the grief for my easier, previous life, and it helped me through my loneliness. It even became a modern baby book of sorts, a place for me to chronicle the day-to-day life of my family.
While we stayed in St. John's until 2015, that little blog dwindled, and the last post was in June of 2011. I didn't know it was the last post at the time, but I guess I just didn't need that blog the same way any longer.
Our family returned to the U.S. (Texas, specifically) in June of 2015, and while I wanted going "home" to be easy I knew it wouldn't be. The babies/toddlers we'd taken to Canada were now 7, 9, and 10, and they were brokenhearted to move somewhere that wasn't home to them at all. A place that couldn't be more different from Canada. I didn't blog to cope with that move. I threw myself into volunteering at the kids' school, I took up tennis lessons, I played Bunco with the neighbors, and, in typical suburban fashion, I micromanaged my kids for the next four years.
Fast-forward to now. Right before Christmas of last year my husband found out we'd be going on another expat assignment. To Milan. A dream location for anyone who has spent a lifetime dreaming of a chance to live in Europe. Not so much a dream location for a tween and two young teenagers who JUST WANT TO STAY in Texas. And let's be honest. While on one hand I was dreaming of pasta, pizza, castles, vineyards, and weekends spent grabbing a train to various European cities, with the other hand I was making endless lists, inventorying our belongings, filling out paperwork, comforting my children, saying goodbye to my friends, and dismantling our life. Again. And instead of sleeping at night I was agonizing over the language barrier that would no doubt exist, the culture shock we'd have to live with, the social and academic transition the kids would face, the fear that I was sabotaging my almost 10th grader by moving him halfway around the world IN HIGH SCHOOL, the adjustment to living in an apartment in downtown Milan versus the 'burbs, and, oh yeah, THE DOGS. Because of course we have two dogs now. Move level: Advanced.
It took 6 months to get here. But get here we did. Dogs included. The logistics of pet transport, sea shipment, work permits, permits to stay, housing certificates, bank accounts, TV tax (?), and recycling would blow your mind. I still can't even talk about it. But we're here, and we're starting to settle in.
And today I felt the urge to blog, and rather than updating that perfect little time capsule of my previous blog I decided to start a new blog. I don't want to analyze my need to blog too much. Because if I did I think the likely conclusion would be that maybe I'm not really that settled yet. I haven't really found my place or my people here yet. But I will. That's the advantage to having done this expat thing before. I know it won't be easy, but it'll be worth it. It'll be worth it to experience these new places and these new people and maybe learn a few things. There are several people in my life that I wouldn't know if we didn't do this. People that I can't imagine not being in my life. I can't wait to meet some more of them here in Milan.
In July of 2008 I was the mother of a 3-month old, a 2-year old, and a 3-year old, and I'd learned approximately a month earlier that we were going on an expat assignment to St. John's, Newfoundland, Canada. The news didn't come as a surprise. My husband and I had been to Moscow, Russia several years earlier, but I returned to the U.S. to give birth to our first child, and we always knew the opportunity to move abroad would likely present itself again. The move to St. John's was not an easy relocation. And not just because my children were young and the weather was unreasonable. (If you've ever lived in or even visited St. John's you know as well as I do that "unreasonable" is exactly how the weather should be described.) But because every relocation is difficult, and international moves add a extra level of difficulty. International moves--even those "just" to Canada--are best undertaken by intermediate players. Beginners beware. I coped with that relocation in 2008 by starting a blog called How Do You Pronounce That? I was home with three little ones, and that blog helped me feel a connection to my family and friends back home. And it became cathartic. It helped me through the grief for my easier, previous life, and it helped me through my loneliness. It even became a modern baby book of sorts, a place for me to chronicle the day-to-day life of my family.
While we stayed in St. John's until 2015, that little blog dwindled, and the last post was in June of 2011. I didn't know it was the last post at the time, but I guess I just didn't need that blog the same way any longer.
Our family returned to the U.S. (Texas, specifically) in June of 2015, and while I wanted going "home" to be easy I knew it wouldn't be. The babies/toddlers we'd taken to Canada were now 7, 9, and 10, and they were brokenhearted to move somewhere that wasn't home to them at all. A place that couldn't be more different from Canada. I didn't blog to cope with that move. I threw myself into volunteering at the kids' school, I took up tennis lessons, I played Bunco with the neighbors, and, in typical suburban fashion, I micromanaged my kids for the next four years.
Fast-forward to now. Right before Christmas of last year my husband found out we'd be going on another expat assignment. To Milan. A dream location for anyone who has spent a lifetime dreaming of a chance to live in Europe. Not so much a dream location for a tween and two young teenagers who JUST WANT TO STAY in Texas. And let's be honest. While on one hand I was dreaming of pasta, pizza, castles, vineyards, and weekends spent grabbing a train to various European cities, with the other hand I was making endless lists, inventorying our belongings, filling out paperwork, comforting my children, saying goodbye to my friends, and dismantling our life. Again. And instead of sleeping at night I was agonizing over the language barrier that would no doubt exist, the culture shock we'd have to live with, the social and academic transition the kids would face, the fear that I was sabotaging my almost 10th grader by moving him halfway around the world IN HIGH SCHOOL, the adjustment to living in an apartment in downtown Milan versus the 'burbs, and, oh yeah, THE DOGS. Because of course we have two dogs now. Move level: Advanced.
It took 6 months to get here. But get here we did. Dogs included. The logistics of pet transport, sea shipment, work permits, permits to stay, housing certificates, bank accounts, TV tax (?), and recycling would blow your mind. I still can't even talk about it. But we're here, and we're starting to settle in.
And today I felt the urge to blog, and rather than updating that perfect little time capsule of my previous blog I decided to start a new blog. I don't want to analyze my need to blog too much. Because if I did I think the likely conclusion would be that maybe I'm not really that settled yet. I haven't really found my place or my people here yet. But I will. That's the advantage to having done this expat thing before. I know it won't be easy, but it'll be worth it. It'll be worth it to experience these new places and these new people and maybe learn a few things. There are several people in my life that I wouldn't know if we didn't do this. People that I can't imagine not being in my life. I can't wait to meet some more of them here in Milan.
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